Create checklist for telling your spouse you would like a divorce
Prepare emotionally
- Think about how you arrived at this decision
- Consider the impact it will have on both you and your spouse
- Write down your thoughts and feelings to clarify them
- Find a therapist who specializes in divorce counseling
- Talk to a trusted friend or family member for emotional support
- Join a support group for individuals going through divorce
- Role-play the conversation with a trusted friend
- Write down key points you want to cover during the discussion
- Rehearse your speech to help build confidence
Plan logistics
- Choose a time when both of you are calm and not rushed
- Select a private and quiet location to ensure privacy and minimize distractions
- Find a trusted caregiver to watch your children during the conversation
- Ensure the children are in a safe and comfortable environment
- Anticipate a range of emotions, including shock, anger, sadness, or acceptance
- Stay calm and composed regardless of your spouse's reaction
Communicate effectively
- Focus on your own emotions and experiences rather than placing blame on your spouse
- For example, say "I feel unhappy in our marriage" instead of "You make me unhappy"
- Avoid beating around the bush or using vague language
- Clearly state that you want a divorce and explain your reasons
- Give your spouse the opportunity to share their thoughts and feelings
- Practice active listening by nodding, making eye contact, and summarizing their points before responding
Discuss next steps
Seek legal advice
Take care of yourself
- Make time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation
- Get enough sleep and maintain a healthy diet
- Exercise regularly to release stress and boost your mood
- Reach out to trusted friends or family members for emotional support
- Join a local or online support group for individuals going through divorce
- Attend therapy sessions with your spouse or individually
- Research therapists or counselors specializing in divorce
- Schedule an appointment for individual or couples therapy
- Be open to exploring your emotions and finding coping strategies
Use in Manifestly